Corny jokes for kids!

There’s nothing like a good laugh to start the day off right! Read below for a list of fruit and vegetable inspired jokes.


Q: How do you make an artichoke?

A: You strangle it.Screenshot 2013-12-12 11.39.28


Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?

A: Quit stalking me!


Q: What school subject is the fruitiest?

A: History because it is full of dates!


Q: Why did the tomato blush?

A: Because it saw the salad dressing.


Q: What vegetables are sailor’s enemies?

A: Leeks


Knock knock! Who’s there?

Lettuce! Lettuce who?

Lettuce in and you’ll find out!


Q: What’s small and red and has a rough voice?

A: A hoarse raddish!


Q: What’s a vampires favourite fruit?

A: A neck-tarine!


Q: What’s brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?

A: A coconut on vacation!


Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor?

A: Because it wasn’t peeling well.


Q: What key do you use to open a banana?

A: A monkey.


Q: When is an apple a grouch?

A: When it is a crab apple.


Knock, knock

Who’s there?


Bean who?

Bean a while since I saw you!


Q: What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato while out for a walk?

A: Ketchup!


Q: Why do mushrooms get invited to all the parties?

A: Because they are such fungis.


Q: What is a plumber’s favourite vegetable?

A: A leek.


Q: Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield?

A: Too many ears.


Although we think we’re funny here at Healthy Kids, we certainly aren’t comedians. So we’ve had to borrow some of these jokes from other people: